Let me begin by saying that I am neither Christian nor Jew, but I am someone deeply religious. Despite practicing a different religion, I must confess that I was brought to tears by the speech given by Charlie Kirk’s widow, Erka, at today’e memorial service for the fallen activist.
When she quoted Jesus’s reported last words, “Father, forive them, for they know not what they do,” and then, with emotion filling every fiber of her being, oxclaimed about her husband’s assassin, “I forgive him,” I literally found myself sobbing.
I found her speech to be probably one of the most moving I’ve heard in my rather long lifetime. As soon as I can get hold of the full transcript, I will reprint it here.
God bless all of you for coming here from all over the world to honor and celebrate my Charlie.
Just a few miles from here, two years ago, at America Fest 2023, Charlie delivered a speech on stage for our TPUSA Faith event. Charlie loved speaking off the cuff. He was very good at that—without a script. So I personally didn’t know what he was going to say.
And what he chose to speak about that day was his submission to the will of God. He quoted one of his favorite Bible verses, Isaiah chapter 6, verse 8: “Here I am, Lord. Send me.”
After Charlie finished, I met him backstage and spoke to him. And I’ll never forget this. I said, “Charlie, baby, please talk to me next time before you say that statement.” Because when you say something like that, there is so much power in that verse. When you say, “Here I am, Lord. Use me,” God will take you up on that.
And He did—with Charlie.
Eleven days ago, God accepted that total surrender from my husband, and then called him to His side. More than anything, Charlie wanted to do not his will, but God’s will.
And over these past 11 days, through all the pain, never before have I found as much comfort as I now do today in the words of our Lord’s Prayer: “Thy will be done.”
God’s love was revealed to me on the very day my husband was murdered.
On the afternoon of September 10th, I arrived at a Utah hospital to do the unthinkable—to look directly at my husband’s murdered body. I saw the wound that ended his life. I felt everything you would expect to feel. I felt shock. I felt horror. And I felt a level of heartache that I didn’t even know existed.
But there was something else too. Even in death, I could see the man that I love. I saw the one single gray hair on the side of his head—which I never told him about. Now he knows.
Sorry, baby. Telling you now, but I never told him. Didn’t want to.
I also saw this: I saw on his lips the faintest smile.
And that told me something important. It revealed to me a great mercy from God in this tragedy. When I saw that, it told me that Charlie didn’t suffer.
Even the doctor told me—it was something so instant that even if Charlie had been shot in the operating room itself, nothing could have been done.
There was no pain. There was no fear. No agony.
One moment, Charlie was doing what he loved—arguing and debating on campus, fighting for the gospel and truth in front of a big crowd.
And then he blinked.
He blinked and saw his Savior in paradise. And all the heavenly mysteries were revealed to him.
God’s love continued to be revealed to me in the days that followed.
The next day, on the tarmac in Air Force Two, I confronted Usha Vance—precious woman. I held her hand and I told her, honestly, “I do not know how I’m going to get through this.”
She told me something. She said, “You know when you’re on an airplane with your kids, and it’s the last 15 minutes of the flight, and things are crazy? Kids are not cooperating, toys are flying everywhere, and everyone’s screaming? And you think to yourself, I cannot wait for this flight to land. And it’s 15 minutes before you land?”
And she told me: “You will get through these 15 minutes—and the next 15 minutes after that.”
Usha, I don’t think you realized it then, but those words were exactly what I needed to hear.
But most of all, God’s mercy and God’s love have been revealed to me these past 10 days.
After Charlie’s assassination, we didn’t see violence. We didn’t see rioting. We didn’t see revolution.
Instead, we saw what my husband always prayed he would see in this country.
We saw revival.
This past week, we saw people open a Bible for the first time in a decade. We saw people pray for the first time since they were children. We saw people go to a church service for the first time in their entire lives.
Charlie liked to journal. And I say this because he did it to remember important moments and sayings that affected him. One of the things he wrote in his journal was this:
“Every time you make a decision, it puts a mark on your soul.”
To those of you out there who just made that decision and took the first step toward a spiritual life—I say thank you, and welcome.
One day, I hope you look back and realize it was the most important decision of your life—because it is.
All of you—those who are already believers—it is your job to shepherd these people. Do not take that lightly.
Water the seed of their faith. Protect it. And help it grow.
Every day, as Charlie rode into the office, he would go through his contact list—and I know many of you were impacted by this. He would go through his contact list and send Bible verses for the day.
He knew that faith was a habit. The more you live it, the more it grows.
But know this too: the seed has only just been planted.
The enemy will tempt you the most in a time like this. God will always be there for you—but you must choose to mark your soul again and again in the direction of Christ.
Pray again.
Read the Bible again.
Go to church next Sunday—and the Sunday after that.
Break free from the temptations and shackles of this world.
Being a follower of Christ is not easy. It’s not supposed to be.
Jesus said: “If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself, take up his cross, and follow me.”
He said He would be persecuted. He said we would be persecuted.
And Charlie knew that—and happily carried his cross all the way to the end.
And I want all of you to know:
While Charlie died far too early, he was also ready to die.
There was nothing—nothing—he was putting off.
There was nothing too hard or too painful.
There was nothing he felt like he didn’t want to do.
He left this world without regrets.
He did 100% of what he could—every day.
But I want you to know something:
Charlie died with incomplete work, but not with unfinished business.
But I will miss him.
I will miss him so much, because our marriage and our family were beautiful.
The greatest cause in Charlie’s life was trying to revive the American family. When he spoke to young people, he was always eager to tell them about God’s vision for marriage—and how, if they could just dare to live it out, it would enrich every part of their life in the same way it enriched ours.
Someone once asked me how Charlie and I kept our marriage so strong when he was busy traveling.
And our little secret? It was love notes.
Every Saturday, Charlie wrote one for me. He never missed a Saturday.
In every single one of them, he’d tell me what his highlight was for the week, how grateful he was for me and our babies.
And always, at the end, he would ask the most beautiful question:
“Please let me know how I can better serve you as a husband.”
Charlie perfectly understood God’s role for a Christian husband: a man who leads so that he can serve.
To all the men watching around the world—accept Charlie’s challenge and embrace true manhood.
Be strong and courageous for your families.
Love your wives and lead them.
Love your children and protect them.
Be the spiritual head of your home.
But please—be a leader worth following.
Your wife is not your servant.
Your wife is not your employee.
Your wife is not your slave.
She is your helper.
You are not rivals. You are one flesh—working together for the glory of God.
I was Charlie’s confidant. I was his vault. His closest and most trusted advisor. His best friend.
I poured into him and loved him so deeply. Empowered him—because his love for me drove me to be a better wife.
Every day he honored me, and I prayed that I could be the wife that God needed me to be for my husband.
Women, I have a challenge for you too. Be virtuous.
Our strength is found in God’s design for our role.
We are the guardians.
We are the encouragers.
We are the preservers.
Guard your heart. Everything you do flows from it.
And if you’re a mother, please recognize that is the single most important ministry you have.
In our home, because Charlie traveled a lot, we tried to travel with him where we could.
But I made sure that when Charlie returned from work, it was his sacred landing place—away from the worries of the world.
I didn’t make him feel guilty for being away too long, or too much, or getting home too late. I always told him: “Home is here for you, and it’ll be ready for you.”
I made it into a place where he wanted to be as soon as possible when he was on the road.
There was no keeping score between us. We were a team, working together for the same mission.
I never wanted to be the one standing between Charlie and the task that God had prepared for him. And I knew Charlie would always do his best to help me with the same.
My marriage with Charlie was the best thing that ever happened to me. And I know it was the best thing that ever happened to him as well.
He wanted everyone to experience that joy. And that’s what’s so beautiful about God’s design for marriage—everyone can.
Charlie’s mission, above all, was aimed directly at those who aren’t married.
He named his organization well. He knew things were not right with America—especially with young people. And they needed a new direction.
Charlie passionately wanted to reach and save the lost boys of the West—the young men who feel like they have no direction, no purpose, no faith, and no reason to live.
The men wasting their lives on distractions.
The men consumed with resentment, anger, and hate.
Charlie wanted to help them. He wanted them to have a home with Turning Point USA.
When he went onto campus, he was looking to show them a better path—a better life that was right there for the taking.
My husband, Charlie, he wanted to save young men just like the one who took his life.
That young man.
That young man.
On the cross, our Savior said: “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.”
That man—that young man—I forgive him.
I forgive him because it’s what Christ did.
And it’s what Charlie would do.
The answer to hate is not hate.
The answer—we know from the gospel—is love.
Always love.
Love for our enemies.
Love for those who persecute us.
